Dermatillomanic

I've had an anxiety disorder for as long as I can remember. Suffered from Dermatillomania, more commonly known as CSP (compulsive skin picking), for 15 years. Nail biter. I made this blog to document and help me in my recovery and you can follow me if you feel it'll do you some good too.

Posts tagged CSP

I did a lightening mask on my scars. I will put up a review once I’ve had a chance to really use it at least a few more times. A friend who uses it regularly suggested I try it because she’s had good results. I’m only tackling pigment correction as part of my recovery because I feel I’m picking a lot less. If you don’t really try to stop picking, it’s pointless to try and get rid of scarring because you’re undoing all your hard work. Remember that.

I did a lightening mask on my scars. I will put up a review once I’ve had a chance to really use it at least a few more times. A friend who uses it regularly suggested I try it because she’s had good results. I’m only tackling pigment correction as part of my recovery because I feel I’m picking a lot less. If you don’t really try to stop picking, it’s pointless to try and get rid of scarring because you’re undoing all your hard work. Remember that.

I sleep alone. I wake up alone.

Stop bleeding for everyone else because, sure as fuck, no one is bleeding for you. Get comfortable in your body, because it’s the only thing keeping your insides from unravelling. Not anyone or anything else. 

4.1.14

Today I forced myself to finish an exercise in self-awareness to address my picking issues. I’ve attempted this twice before unsuccessfully because it felt like I had too many scars to possibly count and I didn’t feel like I could account for every single reminder of self-harm on my body, until now. After about an hour of using a marker to count them all and write down my tally, I have 1,748 reminders that I need to get better. I’m holding myself responsible instead of continuing to blindly pick away at myself. It’s time to work harder and be mindful of my hands.

Mentally and physically, I think this is the most fucked up I’ve ever been. The rest of my body looks a lot like this too. I’m sorry if this is triggering, I don’t think I quite know how to put a “Read more” link through in posts. I don’t want to do this anymore, I really don’t. 
I guess I’ll have to start over tomorrow. 

Mentally and physically, I think this is the most fucked up I’ve ever been. The rest of my body looks a lot like this too. I’m sorry if this is triggering, I don’t think I quite know how to put a “Read more” link through in posts. I don’t want to do this anymore, I really don’t. 

I guess I’ll have to start over tomorrow. 


Band-Aids have been really helpful the last few days. 
I recommend them for those of us who really can’t stop picking at a certain area . Make sure to change them when they’re wet or starting to fall off. Keep the wound dressed and dry and that physical barrier between your finger tips and that scab will make all the difference in letting you heal. 
Go out and get some cool Band-Aids and have fun with it :) 

Band-Aids have been really helpful the last few days. 

I recommend them for those of us who really can’t stop picking at a certain area . Make sure to change them when they’re wet or starting to fall off. Keep the wound dressed and dry and that physical barrier between your finger tips and that scab will make all the difference in letting you heal. 

Go out and get some cool Band-Aids and have fun with it :) 

Worst week of Accutane so far. Just finished my first cycle today. My face feels horrible. Everything peels and burns and just hurts. Hopefully it will all be worth it in the end. 

My back thankfully isn’t breaking out anymore. At least this means it’s starting to work. 

I switched from Clarivis to Amnesteem, which I heard has less side effects and is more effective.

Worst week of Accutane so far. Just finished my first cycle today. My face feels horrible. Everything peels and burns and just hurts. Hopefully it will all be worth it in the end.

My back thankfully isn’t breaking out anymore. At least this means it’s starting to work.

I switched from Clarivis to Amnesteem, which I heard has less side effects and is more effective.